This Page was Updated on 13-Feb-2010

1. If 4 out of 5 dentists recommend sugarless gum then does the fifth one recommend pure sugar gum? (Contributed by Don F.)
2. Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? (Contributed by Don F.)
3. If looks aren't everything why are plastic surgeons so busy? (Contributed by Don F.)
4. Doctors practice medicine and lawyers practice law. Don't you think they should have to know what they're doing before they take money for it? When they're done practicing and turn pro then they could get paid. (Contributed by Catfish Jones)
5. If doctors are knowing more and more about less and less when will they know Everything about Nothing? (Contributed by FMS)
6. Is a Gynecologist simple a doctor who was too short to be a brain surgeon? (Contributed by Alex Petty)
7. Why do all doctors have trouble walking? They must since they all have a medical staff don't they? (Contributed by J.J.)
8. Why do doctors ask "What seems to be the problem today"? They're the doctor! Shouldn't they be telling us? (Contributed by Tooner)
9. Why do so many male psychologists and psychiatrists wear beards? What are they trying to hide? (Contributed by Richard Rhodes)
10. Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"? (Contributed by Erik Freeman)
11. Shouldn't your family doctor be called a family director? After all they direct you from one specialist to another don't they? (Contributed by Jim Adams)
12. Ever wonder what number your doctor was in his graduating class? (Contributed by Jim Adams)
13. If your Doctor tells you to strip to the waist do you take off your shirt or your pants? (Contributed by Jim Adams)
14. If doctors are sometimes called 'Doc' why don't we call lawyers "Law'? Or for that matter accountants 'Count'? (Contributed by W.J. Newhart)
15. Would you call an eye doctor who works in the islands off Alaska an Optical Aleutian? (Contributed by Seymore Butts)
16. Does a psychologist ever have psychological disorders? (Contributed by Juneisy)
17. Why is it that when the Dentist has both of his hands in your mouth he wants to carry on a conversation? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
18. Why do psychiatrists tell you to speak freely and then try to charge you $90 an hour? (Contributed by Jim Moore Jr.)
19. Does a candy a day give the dentist his pay? (Contributed by Alex Petty)
20. Why do physician's offices insist that you be on time for your appointment when they know they'll keep you waiting at least 30 minutes? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
21. How many years of studying physics does it take to become a physician? (Contributed by J. Horn)
22. Don't you just hate it when you go to the doctor and you're sitting on the examination table telling him about your symptoms and with each new one you describe, he backs a little further away from you? (Contributed by Rodney & Cathy's Joke List)
23. Why do dentists tell you not to use anything sharp to clean your teeth, yet when you go in for a check up, the first thing they do is poke your teeth with a sharp metal pick? (Contributed by Adam Style)
24. How come when you go to the dentist, he pokes you with a metal stick and asks if it hurts? Of course it hurts, doesn't it? (Contributed by Ossie Michelin)
25. Do doctors make you sit in their waiting rooms for a long time because they believe that time heals all wounds? (Contributed by The Duke of Endor)
26. Might the reason surgeons wear facemasks be that if they make a mistake, no one will know who did it? (Contributed by MailBits.com)
27. If a doctor is doctoring a doctor, does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor the doctor being doctored the way the doctor being doctored wants to be doctored, or does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctor the doctor being doctored the way the doctoring doctor usually doctors? (Contributed by Nancy)
28. How come Doctors only ask the nurse's their names when the patient isn't doing well? (Contributed by Mr. FBI)
29. If a Dentist makes a mistake, is it acci-dental? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
30. How come you can always read a doctor's bill but never their prescription? (Contributed by F. Dunne)
31. Are the paintings in a psychiatrist's office orna-mental? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
32. What's the difference between an opthalmologist, an optometrist, and an optician? (Contributed by MailBits.com)
33. Why is it that the waiting rooms with the best magazines are where you have the shortest waits? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
34. Is it true that old cardiac surgeons never die, they just get bypassed? (Contributed by Rodney & Cathy's Joke List)
35. Do doctors have x-ray vision because they know exactly what's wrong with you after you've told them your symptoms and you haven't had any x-rays done? (Contributed by Valerie)
36. Isn't a bartender just a pharmacist with a limited inventory? (Contributed by The Duke of Endor)
37. Why, when the cops have to take a body for an autopsy, is there always a 'wacky' pathologist who keeps their lunch in the specimen fridge? (Contributed by Brenda)
38. How come you have to wait for two months to get an appointment with your doctor and the first thing your doctor says is 'I wish you had come to see me sooner'? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
39. When you are visiting the doctor and are in the stirrups, are you supposed to talk to the doc or be quiet? Maybe you can tell a joke or hum 'Tiptoe Through the Tulips'? (Contributed by Janis G.)
40. Have you ever wondered how many boogies a dentist sees? (Contributed by Janis G.)
41. Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing? (Contributed by Gord)
42. If you can't fall asleep at home, why do they think you will at a sleep clinic? (Contributed by Judy S.)
43. Doesn't the phrase 'Does this hurt?' seem rather stupid when the dentist has a 4 inch needle stuck in your gums? (Contributed by Judy S.)
44. How come, if I try to make a doctors appointment today because I'm sick, they only offer me an appointment 3 weeks from today? (Contributed by Judy S.)
45. Do dermatologists make rash judgements? (Contributed by Patricia Majewski)
46. Why do people say, 'He's a male nurse'? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
47. Do doctors who treat anorexics think their patients are wearing thin? (Contributed by Pam)
48. Do Dentists have their own flossify on how to keep teeth clean? (Contributed by Steve)
49. Does the Dentist of the Year get a little plaque? (Contributed by Lyn R.)
50. If you cross a Dentist with a Chiropodist, do you get a doctor who specializes in foot-in-mouth disease? (Contributed by Lyn R.)
51. Why do dentists make you feel like your teeth are the worst they’ve ever seen? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
52. Should you ever trust a dentist who doesn’t smile? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
53. How can pharmacies claim to be drug-free workplaces? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
54. When surgical stitches were first used, did the inventor say, “Suture self”? (Contributed by Joe)
55. Do we call them shrinks because they make you feel so small? (Contributed by Ralphie)
56. What happens if the dentist gets a cavity? Would he get fired? (Contributed by Valerie)

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